Been Waiting On This For A While [tag: anyone]

Todd nodded, frustrated for her that these were things she had to think about. "I reckon you'll know when she's ready to be told - and when you're ready to tell her, of course," he sighed.

"The chapter-starting might be a bit easier once you've emptied out all the pregnancy hormones," he agreed, allowing himself another sigh. "I think you've come a long way, though, Brie. All this talking about Alyvia - I know she'll be a good part to your life no matter how she came to be, and I'm glad you'll have her."

(Sorry I took so long to post! I started to multitask and it just ended up being this 10+ tab madness. xD}

"Yeah, that's true.. but she is the most important thing in my life right now, along with you all. I might have my moments-- and Jim witnessed one of my worse ones the other day-- but I'm grateful for everything.. and when I say everything, I mean it."

She put her hands in her lap, tapping on her thighs lightly. "I think about little Everett every day, I do.. but I can't spend all of my days dwelling on the past.. same goes for what happened with us. There's more pressing issues on the horizon here.. and as much as I've thought about it, I can't control what happens."

((Pfft, no problem! Merlin knows I get that way, and I'll be pretty slow to reply since I'm playing Boardgame with friends.))

"That's good - really good," he said, nodding. He knew how much losing that first baby boy had hurt her, and he'd never wish anything like that on anyone. It was good that she wasn't going to dwell on such a horrible thing forever. He still didn't know what to make of what had happened between them, but he was content right now to be her friend. She was pregnant, and he figured friends were what she needed the most right now. "I still don't know about all that stuff, but...I swear I'll be here for you, Brie."

((Also I had named one of Todd's brothers Everett, but I swear it was without any reference of Brie's first baby because I'm not sure if I even knew about him at that point but omg, I have no idea what to make of the coincidence.))

"I know," she simply said, "I know. You don't have to swear, because I know. I'll always know. That's one thing I know will never change." She smiled yet again, looking around at the vast array of books. "Personal knowledge does more for me than physical evidence ever will.. you don't have to be around me 24/7 for me to know that you'll be here.. and you know the same goes when it comes to me being there for you, too.. at least, I hope you know that."

(..fanfiction idea coming where Brieanne meets brother Everett. MY GOODNESS, THE COINCIDENCE.)

Todd nodded, managing a warm smile. "I do know that," he assured her, suddenly filled with a certain kind of peace. He was glad they were getting all this out in the open - of course, they knew they'd be there for each other, but saying it aloud gave the words somehow more meaning. It just felt good to express what he felt, to use honesty right now above all else. He glanced around, eyes bright with a new sense of lightness. "I reckon I should get that book rather soon..." His eyes drifted over to her drawing and he smiled. "Nice dress, by the way." He meant it, too.


((IS IT NOT AN OVERWHELMING AMOUNT OF IRONY?))

A wave of relief washed over Brie's face. Hearing Todd confirm his knowledge comforted her more than anything.. It released tension, relaxed her mind.. and she loved the feeling. "Want help finding it?" She then looked down at her seemingly forgotten about drawing and grinned at him. "Thanks ..You know, I might have to make something like this.. for the Halloween thing."

(SO MUCH IRONY. Off to bed, night dear!)

((Aughh, sorry this took so long! Was at a party.))

Todd smiled as he stood and nodded. "Sure, I'm looking for one called 'Runes Made Easy'," he replied brightly, leading the way to the Runes section of the library as he looked over the shelves. He glanced up in surprise and cocked his head when she mentioned making a dress. "I didn't know you could...sew or whatever all you need to be able to do to make a dress," he said, taking a book from the shelf and examining it before replacing it.

Brieanne took a few moments to hoist herself up, putting a protective hand around her stomach as she did so. Now, you could really see how big she was; it almost looked as if she had taken a huge balloon and replaced it with her own tummy. She wobbled to the bookshelves, going to look at the near top of them. "Yeah, I sew.. have been for a while. I just never told much of anyone," said she, grinning as she ran her hands over a couple of shelves. "Oh, I think I've found it, Toddy!" she exclaimed, pulling it gingerly off the shelf and waving it at him. "Is this it?"

He noticed how...well, pregnant she was, but decided against mentioning it. He'd heard somewhere that that was never a good idea. Todd brightened when he saw the familiar book and hurried over to examine it. "Ah! Yes indeedy it is! You are a splendid finder of books, Brie," he exclaimed with a grin. "You're going to make your dress for the ball, then? It's sure to be elegant and feather-full."

"Well, just call me whenever you need to spot out a book," she said proudly, a grin brightening up her face. She handed him the book, going over to the window. It was snowing out, quite lightly, but beautiful nonetheless. "Yeah, I am.. I don't know what colors I'm going to use, though.. I always have that issue," she said, shrugging. "I always have issues with choosing things nowadays.. I can't do it by myself. Guess it's all those years of being cooped up in that house.." she muttered, touching the glass, "And now I don't even know what to do with myself. I'm so lost."

She turned towards Todd, a sentimental look in her eyes. "You ever feel like that, Todd? Like you're just.. floating through life?"

Todd watched her go towards the window as he set the book down on the table they sat at earlier, beside her drawing. He blinked at her words before nodding slowly. Yes, he knew that feeling well. He had been feeling that way for most of his teenage life and even some of his early childhood. Especially after the loss of his mom. He vaguely remembered "wandering around the house as a little kid, refusing to talk to people for days. "Yeah...yeah, I do. A lot, actually." He refocused his thoughts to her dilemmas, though he couldn't fathom any way he could do much to help.

Brie sighed, running a hand through her hair. Looking down at her stomach, she felt a rush of security.. but she also felt scared. Scared for herself AND scared for little Alyvia.. and she didn't know what was in store for her. "I understand." She let her words sink in before she spoke again, this time a bit more softly. "Y'know, Toddy, I realized that I've been very selfish at times.. you might not think so, but I know myself, and I know I have. I know you've gone through some tough stuff too.. and I feel like you've put that on the back burner for me, and I don't like knowing that fact."

She went to sit back down, a sigh of relief releasing itself from her body, "I guess what I'm trying to say is that, y'know.. even if I'm whining and stuff about my life, you can tell me about yours too without worrying if I'll take offense to it. We're a family, right? Me, you, Evaine, Jim.. we're sticking together through it all."

Todd nodded again, rather surprised that she'd brought up being 'selfish' at all. "I, uh...I know you'd care about that stuff if I tried to tell you about...things," he started, eyes wandering over the library to avoid looking directly at her. Oh, he was never good with this serious talk.

"I just wouldn't know how to go about telling anyone things like that," he sighed, leaning against a nearby bookshelf and staring down at his shoes. "I don't really have these conversations, if you can't tell by my obvious failure at it."

Brie folded her arms on the table, laying her head on it. "And this is why you need to have them. You not having anyone to vent to is a completely unacceptable issue and I will not allow it."

Her eyes closed for a split second, but opened soon after. "I'm not saying you have to, but it'd make me feel better if you came to me whenever you felt down or whatever. I don't like knowing you hurt too."

Todd cocked his head slightly, figuring that she was right, but that didn't make saying it aloud any easier. "I just...feel like whining to anyone doesn't make sense when all you guys have things happening right now that are so much worse," he sighed, shrugging a shoulder halfheartedly. "The only huge thing that's happened directly to me is losing my mum, but..." He pursed his lips and shook his head. His brothers rarely talked about this, and he knew it would break his father's heart to bring up his late wife, so Todd was very much out of practice when it came to this subject. He had no idea how to go about anything of the sort.

"You're not whining," she said sharply, sitting up promptly, "And this is why I didn't say anything about my life for the time that I could.. because it makes you suppress your venting. Everyone needs someone to have their back, even if they don't understand. Everyone should have each other's backs because everyone deserves a true friend. I know when to shut up about my issues."

Brieanne bit her lip, closing her eyes briefly. "Todd.. I don't care if there were 50 billion things, big or small, that had happened to you. I just want you to know and to take advantage of the fact that I'm here and I will listen, even if no one else will."

"Trust me, you talking about your life does not suppress my venting," he assured Brie, coming to sit across from her. "It's suppressed enough all on its own." She was right about that, though - she was right about a lot of things, it seemed - everyone did need a true friend, and it seemed she was a good candidate for that.

Todd furrowed his brow, studying the whorls in the wood of the table. "I'm really, really grateful you're, uh, willing to listen and everything. I just...I don't know how to give you something to hear." There was, besides his mother, the whole situation with Penny. But he couldn't ramble to Brie about that - he wasn't that heartless. "I just...all of you have these things going on, now, in the present. And everything with me is stuck in the past or nothing I can change...none of you have done a thing to make me feel that way, but my problems feel so inferior. Like - my brother, right, he's getting engaged but his fiance has a super judgmental family and we're not really the richest people on earth, so...that's a real problem, right?" He knew he had problems of his own, but could never seem to think of them in the face of everyone else's miseries.

"And it's a good thing they are inferior, Todd," she said, wetting her lips before speaking again, "But I'm not asking you to tell me anything now. Even though I'm all blown up and tired and all this other stuff, I'm still the same compassionate person you met that day in the Great Hall. I'm just.. a bit weathered down, is all."

She smiled at him, putting her chin in her right palm. "It is a real problem. Judgemental people are lame.. plus, if the girl's family really focuses on that instead of the obvious love between your brother and her.. then I guess she doesn't deserve 'em, y'know what I mean? People like that are so ignorant.. then again, I'm the daughter of one of 'em, so.."

(sorry it look me so long to post.. my laptop's being all wonky and i had family come home so. plus i'm working on more Brie/Todd stuffs

Todd smiled and nodded; there was no doubt that she was that same compassionate person. He could still see the old Brie there - and for that he was thankful.

He sighed and tapped his fingers against the table. "They really are asshats," he agreed, running a hand through his short red hair. "Though you know you don't count in that - willing to walk among peasants like me, aren't you?" he teased lightly.

((And I'm sorry my reply is such crap. Just not feeling particularly uppity today -.-))

(No no no, it's totally fine. <3 I hope you're okay now.. if not, DEE LOVES YOU ASHLEY!! <3 *hugs 90000 times*)

"Pfft, if you wanna say that, I guess I am," she joked, shaking her head. "Glad you think I'm not ignorant.. I think I would have died right here if you'd thought otherwise."

She bit her lip, stretching her arms momentarily. "I think the ol' group needs to hang out soon, don'tcha think? I miss teasing Jimmyboy and Moonie about their obviously apparent adorableness."

((DITTO, DEE DARLIN'!
I'm just in a weird place lately but hopefully something will change soon.^_^))

Todd grinned. "Well, I am flattered to know my opinion has the power to inflict so much on you - I though if it has the power to kill you, I probably need to rethink my life choices," he said, giving s low chuckle.

He nodded, agreeing wholeheartedly. "Why yes I do! It's been quite a long time since I've observed the Adorables in their natural habitat!" That did sound like a good idea - with all their turmoil lately, they could all use each other.

((DAMMIT I AM ON MOBILE AND I CAN'T RELOG INTO TODD'S AND CHANGE IT BLARGH.))

(It will, it will <33 I know it! ;D)

Brieanne laughed, her eyes sparkling in the light. "Yeah, you might need to.. I don't need to die. Everyone loves me too much," she boasted, sticking out her tongue at him.

A light happiness washed over her as he agreed with her suggestion. "It has been quite a while, hasn't it? Good that I suggested it, then!"

(.. I was listening to this song and I thought about writing this fanfic where Brie gets married and EVERYBODY comes.. and it'd just be memories and feels everywhere. I've been doing that lately.. evoking all the feelsss~)

((Well, if Dee thinks so it must be true!))

"Right you are - and not egotistical at all!" A smirk lit across his features and a layer of sarcasm coated his words.

He bobbed his head slightly. "Mhm, you are just bursting with good ideas and book-finding today!"

((Omg, I would read the hell out of that fic.))

"Nope, not at ALL," echoed Brieanne, "That can't even be possible! Brieanne Devereaux, egoTISTICAL? BOTHER!"

She couldn't help but double over in laughter at her own antics. Brie couldn't even see herself being even the slightest bit egotistical, and it was the complete truth.

"I am, aren't I? I should totally become a.. book-finding good idea having.. uh, person."

(Working on it now~ <3

Brie talks to Todd at the reception alone.. and this is how it goes.

"You're a beautiful bride, Brieanne. He's a lucky guy."

"..You know you could've been him, right?"

"Brie, don't go down that road.. don't do that to yourself. That was years ago."

"It was years ago, yes, but you know that, right?"

"Yeah, Brie. I do.. but you know it just wasn't going to work out that way. I didn't want to hurt you."

"You didn't want to, but you did.. and now I'm married, trying to move on, and it's like.. I still can't let go. There will come a time where I will, but.. even now, I can't. I'm Mrs. [insertlastnameherebecauseIhaventthoughtofityet] now.. and I'm suddenly wishing I wasn't. This is what you do to me, Todd.. this is what you've always done to me, and it's not your fault.. it's my heart's."

little preview, there. xD]

Todd laughed along with her, rolling his eyes teasingly. "'Idea-giving book-finding person', huh?" he snickered. "Real official title you have there, Brie. Come up with that yourself?"

((DEE UGH FEELS. Makes me feel so guilty for Todd >3<))